I clearly remember when my family and I were watching the news of the revolutions in Egypt and Libya, sarcastically dreaming if it could ever reach Bashar Al Assad’s Syria. On the 15th of march, it did. We were stunned. Videos coming out of Daraa’s tortured children were beyond plausible. Then the videos of the protests in Daraa, followed by Lattakia, followed by Damascus, followed by Homs, followed by Idlib, followed by every single city and town across the Syrian land. Then, here we are now, attaining 12 months of resistance and steadfastness under a crackdown  carried out by a regime that defines savagery and barbarism.

I come from the city of Homs, a city I’ve never felt much content to visit. Boredom was the monopoly  in there. My satisfaction was checking on both my father’s and mother’s family; the things that made me laugh to tears were our joyful spirits and endless Homsi jokes. I always thought to myself why do not people there prosper and thrive for a better life; why live in such misery and in such aged streets and buildings. I always mulled  that if education in Syria is awfully intricate- thus universities should graduate geniuses- why isn’t the country improving? Why are they stuck in this stalemate regarding flourishment?  But, I have never deemed that the solution to all my questions is A Revolution. When my people decided  to solve my endless questions, they got bombarded by Assad’s mortar bombs and slaughtered by the knives of his Shabiha (thugs). Now my city is destroyed by Assad regime, and I regret every thought similar to those I just cited. I regret not being proud, not feeling blissful, not feeling happy in the streets of Al Ghouta and the cafes Al Malaab, not loving Al Dablan’s cloth shops. I regret not getting used to the sour Arabic Yogurt (Laban Al Arabi), which by the way is the best yogurt you would ever have. I regret not walking more than the diurnal 5 hours I used to walk with my cousin, roaming around the city until our feet get swollen…

My city, Homs, is shattered and hurt. It’s a heart-wrenching feeling no one would ever comprehend except those who are feeling it now: we, Syrians.  For one whole year, Syria in all has been under attack since the families and youth of Syria decided to revolt on the 15th of March,2011 against the brutal suppression. Determined to thrive and grow, to live with dignity,to speak up, and to gain our permissible freedom of speech, we have paid a hefty price:+10,000 deaths,+700 dead children,+500 dead women, +100,000 detainees, +250,000 refugees, +1,000s tortured in Assad’s dungeons and underground jails,+100s of women raped,+1,000s of minors molested,+1,000s of men sodomized…

Yet, after one whole year, the world is as silent and contemptible as it has been. For one bloody  year, the International community stands helpless and apparently complicit and responsible in consenting on the atrocities Bashar Al Assad’s militias are committing. 

We Syrians started this battle with the totalitarian regime alone, and shall continue this fight alone if the International community insists on embarrassing itself by holding longer onto the Assads and their Baathist reign. Bashar Al Assad has brought in the forces of his allies, including Revolutionary Guards from Iran , Hezballah soldiers from Lebanon, and heads of intelligence forces from Lavrov’s Russia. Assad also bought arms from Russia worth $1 billion in 2011, which are being used to bombard civilian houses in the length and breadth of Syria. Yet, we Syrians own nothing at all. Whilst the genocide is ongoing, the International community’s reactions have been a summary of “deploring and condemning, condemning and deploring” the *excessive violence* being used against us. 

I cannot assert that I am part of the revolution. I am nothing and shall not be mentioned in these history-in-making incidents. The children in the front-lines in protests are to be mentioned, the widowed women and men are to be mentioned, our brave activists are to be mentioned, our citizen journalists and cameramen are to be mentioned… Still, it is the duty of every Human to be the echo of my people’s screams in the darkness of this unconscious, deaf world. Our blood is sacred and we rebuff allowing countries of power to use Syria and its people to resolve  pitiable and demeaning political conflicts. We are asking for no one’s sympathy or tears. Syrians are running out of life.